My name is Bertha, better known around here as Editor Berty. Of course, I have a last name, but that's all I'm telling you. My father, ironically known to many as Bertie from Yreka (BfY - if you have been reading these books, you knew that) was the long-suffering, unpaid editor of the Snark Farley Trilogy 'Murican Nomad. Before he died, my father made me promise to publish the three barely legible manuscripts that had been hidden in our attic for thirty-five years. I didn't want to, but I think there is a law that says you have to honor your dead dad's last request. So, I did and that's why I won't tell you my whole name. People are going to be triggered by these stupid books.
Snark Farley was one of a kind. Born on the road (Route 66 to be exact) and raised in a crappy old school bus turned into a crappy old RV by his parents, who were a couple of crappy old ex-hippies. In the first book, A Smart Ass in Short Pants, he whines about his horrible life as a 'slave' to his lazy, evil parents. I think he was just trying to justify his very questionable behavior as a teen, and then his even worse behavior as an adult.
In the second book, Love Hurts, he tells us about the love of his life, the beautiful Marissa with the perfect boobs, and how he ruins her life. It wasn't his intention, but Snark never INTENDS to damage things and people, it's just his nature.
The last book, Rolling with the Punches, somehow manages to tie everything up in in nice tidy bow. Too tidy if you ask me. I think Snark knew it too because he asked Dad to hold off on publishing the books until after he was dead. Snark, not Dad, although BfY almost waited too long, and the books almost never saw the light of day.
Wouldn't that have been a shame! If Dad had never called me with that damnable request, I might have been able to get on with my life. Instead, I'm probably an alcoholic now and I have really large jaw muscles from constantly clenching my teeth.
A year. That's how long it took me. I'm beyond caring if the 'Murican Nomad Trilogy is successful. I just want one of you to send me a picture of one of Snark's books being used as a wheelchock. That's what he did with his copy of the Chicago Manual of Style, so it would serve him right.
- Editor Berty
Click below to visit the 'Murican Nomad page on Amazon. The books are available for purchase, or you can get the eBooks free on Kindle Unlimited.
Update 8/1/2024: I was just joking when I asked someone to send me a picture of one of Snark's books being used as a wheelchock. Be careful what you ask for.
I love the internet!